It’s been a while since I’ve written anything for this blog, and to try and get my creativity flowing again, I decided to start with this, just an unbroken flow of words where I can take stress and frustration out.
What bothers me is when I can’t get to my laptop and write what I want to, for how long as I want, and when my creativity fails me for the millionth time. I hate when anyone thinks they’re better than me and shows it, even when I know they are. It bothers me when my friends tell me I can’t do something instead of just supporting me, and it confuses me because why would they try so hard to convince me that I’m not enough for a certain career path. What annoys me is when someone mentions how much food I’ve eaten, or how fast I ate it, and when people stand in the middle of a busy crowd trying to walk by, making everyone’s life harder.
What frustrates me beyond belief is that men are always believed, and everyone questions women. I hate the awful men out there think women are here to please them, that they can do whatever they want without consequences. I hate sexism, misogyny and the looks men give that makes women feel uncomfortable.
What scares me is how we’re using up the planet’s resources and no one seems to care, and it annoys me when people ask me why I’m a vegetarian just to convince me to eat meat again or tell me why they think it’s stupid. I can’t stand it when people choose to ignore what’s going on in the world instead of learning more about it, and when people make plans with you just to cancel them last minute for no good reason at all.
What bothers me is when people undermine what my opinions or my skills, I don’t like it when someone in power abuses their authority and it annoys me that Im not as good of a writer as I wish I could be. What annoys me are anxious thoughts, that sometimes meetings can take over my life and I don’t have time to hang out with people who actually mean something to me. I’m annoyed that sometimes I still feel uncomfortable in my body, by thoughts that tell me I could do more, that I could look better. I’m frustrated by not making real money and that after graduation, I will probably be broke for years to come because of my student loans. The future keeps me up at night sometimes, and my thoughts feel like this: a rambling, unbroken stream of words that refuse to slow down, that refuse to stop.
What bothers me is that I haven’t been able to keep up with this blog or write my book and finish it.
Sometimes we can’t get certain things out of our heads, and writing is such a therapeutic way of letting out frustration and anger. Sometimes you have to stop worrying about what sounds good and just write and let out what you’re feeling.
Take a deep breath, you have good things ahead.